Music Day

Dang.. Either today is music day or I am just really emotional. While I'm working, I like to listen to music and watch music videos cause it helps me concentrate.. I know, I know. I much concentrating can I be doing if I am writing in my blog, but trust me I am getting alot accomplished today..

I ran across another favorite. Aaron Hall's 'I Miss You'. That used to be my jam back in the day too.. The video is about his wife who died during child birth. Because I just gave birth this video hit home for me.

Only 7 weeks ago, I, too, was in labor. Childbirth is the scariest time in a pregnant woman's life. During my delivery, my baby's heart rate started to drop and I was petrified. I could hear his weak heartbeat pause every few seconds. All I could do was pray. I prayed that God took care of my baby.

It also didn't help that I had to have an oxygen mask on. I don't know why, but any mask screams panic mode to me. I guess it is because those in critical condition and those struggling for their lives are seen wearing them on TV.

My panic reached a record high when my doctor and a couple of nurses ran into the room and informed me that my baby's heart rate was so low that it would not survive a vaginal birth and that they had to prep me for an emergency c-section immediately. At that moment, more panic and fear consumed my body. All the while the doctor was speaking, I, too, was speaking but to God. I prayed for God to protect my baby through the c-section. I prayed for God and his angels to keep my baby in his arms.

All in a matter of minutes, my room was filled with nurses who started prepping my body and administering my epidural dosage. Before the initial panic began, a nurse had to adhere a monitoring device onto my baby to help monitor it's heart rate. Yes, the nurse had to adhere a monitoring device onto my baby who was still in my womb. Let's just say that procedure was not a pleasurable one. Well, fast forward to c-section prep, the nurse had to remove the monitoring device considering how the baby would no longer be exiting the way the monitoring device entered. Long story short, the nurse who adhered the device was not available so another nurse had to do it. The original adhering nurse, as the second nurse said, 'did a real good job putting it on' cause it took the second nurse almost 5 minutes to take the device off. It took everything in my power not to scream at the nurse cause while she was playing, my baby heart rate was steadily dropping and my main concern was his safety. So, of course, those 5 minutes only added to my panic.

Throughout it all though, everything was a success. With God's help, my baby was delivered safely and healthy. Watching that video brought my delivery experience back to light and it made me realize how truly precious life is.

It's amazing how music speaks wonders.